Life or Something Like it

I'm so sorry
I simply mean

This wine is aces

I push my way through it, alone
hidden in Mormon guilt
catholic but push it to the hilt

Maybe I will have a chance to live
like you
and yours

The sweet circle that fades even as I see it
like someone looking at me from a bus
from 62
driving over the adironback

But then maybe I get to take another hit
and the thought that you were it
the tammy one except

You were cool

Maybe I was cool

So here's what is left

I get fit
drop 40 pounds
build beautiful art

Angel from my nightmare
I raise my kids
like yours

Good eyes
clean heart
clear thinking

unfettered by tradition
we'll wish it never ends

we'll touch infinity
in the belt of orion

riding through the medicine man silence
the six strings vibrating through the quiet
like indecision
and love

But then what is love

It's not a high school infatuation
It's not a contract
It's not something you wish upon your best friend
It's not something you wish upon your heart

But it comes
like the sun
across an open field

It touches you like cloth
from 1936

The wind from the ocean
The smell of the air

A voice inside my head

It builds upon itself, always bound in trust
and the attempt
of a man for a woman
a woman for a man
a woman for a woman
a man for a man

to make things better
to be sharper, stronger, more true

to do the things we need to do
to live
to grow
to miss you

and wonder if you're ok
to stalk you
and see your family

growing stronger every day

I quietly nod my head to the north
and hope that boston
in the shadow of new england
where winter comes like the scene from
apocalypse now where the saucier
says never get off the boat

I think of your skin
your taste

I think of you
but not the you, maybe, that you are
But that's ok.

I'm not the me that was the me to you.
But here's the fun part.

I think I know what to do.

Or something like that.