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Showing posts from May, 2012

Nothing Like the Sun

I am told that I am an incurable romantic. I am not sure exactly what this means for practical applications - after all, I am perfectly aware of how to be married for 20 years - and I am fairly clear on what one needs to do in that context. I did not say I knew how to do it correctly, but I am not certain that there is one set way to have a relationship that stands the test of time. However, I am certain that love can continue through years. Decades.

I know this for a fact.

I have always felt that love is best measured along the lines of Shakespeare's Sonnet 120 - which some have said , is his sonnet that many refer to as against the romantics. "My Mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun.. coral is far more red than her lips' red ". As a man, I am susceptible to timeless beauty - I have seen it. But it is beauty without artifice. Honestly, I can't think of anything more of a turn-off than a poorly done boob job -true beauty shines through almost anythin…

Invisible Light - The Scissor Sisters

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Dogs and Men

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I found an article today, that got me thinking about who I am. Especially since I am more or less, now, a former dog owner. Its complicated. My dog is essentially living full time with a friend of the family, after having her dog get hit by a school bus. Her and my dog were best friends,and moreover she was really good friends with her dog so I basically just sort of ignored the fact that after the incident, my dog kind of took the place of her old dog. He's happy. I'm happy. Kind of.



But back to the study. The researchers showed that people tend to keep dogs that are similiar to their own personality. As of late - I've been exploring/revelling/terrifying myself right excellent my own vulnerability - and flaws, fighting, among other things - a tendency towards the passive aggressive. Did you know that if you're passive aggressive to people, they can develop a tendency not to trust you? I didn't know that.


Whether or not my dog, reflects me - I can honestly say …

Moonrise Kingdom

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Three AM

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A Poem has a natural form
to live within you

Three AM in the morning
Is a good time to learn

Even if you are hunting
tolerance
beauty
or porn

form follows function
and sometimes
function follows form

An hour or so before
The blue hour

It is then that poems unfold
linking everything
embedding rhythm
media
image
love
and the thin line
within your heart
that makes you want
to tear off your skin

it's a natural phase we all go through

A poem comes , usually, from a bothersome man
focussed on things you'd rather not learn
or would rather forget

maybe too obvious
or overlooked
love
hate
birth school
work death


The distance
The hours
The deeper shade
working as it should

Quite unlike
the hell where everyone gets what they want
and everything tastes gray

We are all good
at being alone

And of course,
being just plain
or Bettie Page

3 AM is one possible time
Where everything is quiet
Except the clouds
and love

Everything is simple

The sculpture upon your desk
yields the touch of stone

Pink Floyd/Live at Pompeii

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17:01

Stars, Songs and Facebook

It's easy to text passive aggressiveness
if you're already aggressive
you're halfway there

Never confuse lust with love
Never let the darkness enfold
if it's two in the morning
it's dark enough

Some names are beautiful
Like Teresa
or William

You can gather them
gather the keeping for years and years

and then
loosen your hand
and let them go

Let go of the textomg
Let go of lust

Loosen your hand
and let them go

Sweet Tides - Thievery Corporation

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Heaven Can Wait

Dad ,Can you give me a dollar?

Why?

Because I want to buy a card for Mom's birthday

But the one you made
is the one she really wants, son.


Well Ok.
Can you give me a dollar anyway?

Why?

Because I want to put it in the card I will give her.

Why? She is going to love the card you made.
Just give her that and she will be happy.


Dad. Come on.

All women love money.






Father and Son - Cat Stevens

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From Our Nonprofit

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This art form is callled "batik". It is done by a person who was helped by a nonprofit that I helped to found. The person was saved from a life on the street, and we discovered he had an artist's abilities. The medium for this painting was candlewax, and his work sold well; he is now self sufficient.



Giving Up The Gun - Vampire Weekend

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Go To Hell

You're a control freak
and a drama queen

You think you know me
You think you know everything
You're not an authority

on what's wrong

When I read what you write at night
I want to tear my skin off

I hate the darkness
I hate the games
you crossed a line
I am not going to put up with this

I have a child to raise
I have a life

Take your passive aggressive SMS
and go shove it up your ass

and while you're at it, here's a pineapple

I am no longer there for you
If you want my update
it's not happening

I'm on the right track
I go to church on the weekend
Let's not be friends

This is the heart of it:
I am not sure
if we can really afford freedom or dignity


Don't ask why I made contact
or why I will again

I only wanted to find out how you were doing
I thought we could talk now and then

Maybe

I have gone through alot of darkness in my life
I don't need to go there again
You have your own problems
solve them

I can't take this anymore

Don't call
Don&…

Zelig - The Meaning of Life

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Images and Thoughts

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It's funny, but my entire life I have looked for a black and white image. Of a cat. From a copy of Heavy Metal, probably circa 1982. It is a simple one page cartoon, drawn in black and white, pen and ink - very detailed and beautiful. Of a man, holding a cat. The scene feels as if it is late at night. Perhaps 2 AM. He has a book of art open - to pages of greek sculpture. And the pages seem to come alive. In the middle of the night. The statues of stone and marble become fierce. Like the nike of samothrace, flying. The expressions are fierce. The man reaches for his kitten. And pets him. You can see the images in his glasses. It's a beautiful to me, and still somehow terrifying.

For Aimee Mullins

You gave me a chance to see a world anew
and once again make me wonder
why I keep putting off my iron man

I think I'll volunteer

When
the chrome spiders come
they will cover me
I will let them

for that is now my plan

I will fall apart
they will cut into my mind
mesh into my nerves
and bring me online

I will trade this body
for augmentation

A decision made in part by the simple beauty of truth
and the truth of you
as in all species
a dream of man
who bore the gentle light of a woman
quietly
and just
in the nick of time

Aimee
you are the black meme
that guides me


I write in simple form
words
poem

First of you
and your simple form
Your legs with tassles
and wood
and kevlar

my personal favorite

I write
by a pen without form
on a page without ink

colorless

in part to meditate
in part to understand
but mostly to appreciate

You

Some TEDtalk
but Aimee
you walk the walk

And that moment you called for
was so short and real and cute
it made me realize beauty can be so simple and sweet…

Words - Kate Miller Heidke

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Avatar of Teresa

Let's drive by a Cow.

And Cheer.

Wait. There's a pony. Over there.

Let's applaud formally.

Games are so much fun.

Especially ones with Avatar

You can become who you are

Or never were

And paint stars upon

Until one by one

They all go out

Gimme Shelter - The Rolling Stones - M. Jagger/ K.Richards

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Drawing the Behavorial Line

Bullying is a form of behavior in which the strong prey abusively upon the weak. The victims of bullying are often young boys. The incidence of bullying amongst young girls, or younger boys victimizing them - approaches zero. Much of the focus in defeating it comes from concerned parents who seek to eliminate the basic mechanisms by which it exists. The exceptions of online-generated drama being the rule.

Unfortunately, the natural development of a young male child - includes play structured around hierarchy. Not collaboration. It is a competition to grow up as a boy - into a man. A complete elimination of all behaviors associated with 'bullying' would result in flat, collaborative, non hierarchical school environment. Peace sells. But who's buying?


This type of flattened cultural environment is not a departure from the pattern of play of young girls, who are by their very nature more adept at playing with each other. They are creative in their play. Their play fosters…

Island - Heather Nova

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Facebook

The internet
is like the wild west
You carry your defenses there
Wild horses
dry riverbeds
and malware

Each of us has had our own
showdown by cellphone
at the OK Corral
even if the cell providers cheated on the draw

Facebook
is just a website
a bunch of pages and some code

a stop
on your way to the gold
that many find the need
a place to connect but not to bond
and keep away from
what's up ahead
growing body parts out of their own clone
from DNA off the net
smart codes on gravestones
linking you to everyone
with a smartphone

The internet has a future,
you can stop it.

Facebook is like a small town trying to grow.
It has its house of ill repute.
This is a site where it's easy to register
They'll hide everything there
behind that
They don't know why we give it to them.
The Dumbf-ks.

It makes them feel like they're walking tall
The ground shimmers
in the desert sun
The Peraltas
they all want to grow wealthy
selling you
advertising

ButwhatifIdontwantmytoothpastedel…

Fireflies - Owl City

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A Conversation With A Boy

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The summer is coming. As much as you have fun with the little girl down the street, it's just not going to do.

He replied. I know. I really like to play with her younger sister. Whenever I play with her, she doesn't spend her time making up all these really stupid rules.

I understand. It's ok. Girls are one thing. Playing is another, sometimes. You can have a girlfriend, too. But it's not going to be the same. This is your summer. So what are you going to do? What about baseball? The smell of freshly cut grass. The crack of bat against ball. Running the bases home.


Then said the boy. The tennis court has a part of it painted into a baseball diamond. There's a lot of things I can do there.

Tennis is good. But remember, you have to find someone to play against. You can skateboard. Ok. Here comes the bus...

He grabs his backpack, and runs as fast as he can. He always runs. The bus driver will wait for no one. I watch him run off.

There is a sign on my desk…

A New Era In Space Travel

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A Prayer for Water

We dig deeper every year
And a few years ago

We hit poison

Welling up, clear
At first affecting the children

And then black spots began to appear on our skin

A man comes, today
to see if he can make it go away

We pray
He will succeed


There are only two types of prayer

Word

and

Deed


Guess which one I need

The Nothing Song - Sigur Ros

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No Sugar Tonight - Randy Bachman/ The Guess Who

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Lonely feelin' deep inside
Find a corner where I can hide
Silent footsteps crowdin' me
Sudden darkness, but I can see

No sugar tonight in my coffee
No sugar tonight in my tea
No sugar to stand beside me
No sugar to run with me



In the silence
of her mind
Quiet movements
I can find
Grabbin' for me
with her eyes
Now I'm fallin'
from her skies




No sugar tonight in my coffee
No sugar tonight in my tea
No sugar to stand beside me
No sugar to run with me


Jocko says yes and I believe him
When we talk about the things I say
She hasn't got the faith or the guts to leave him
When they're standin' in each other's way
You're driven back now to places you've been to
You're wonderin' what you're gonna find
You know you've been wrong but it won't be long
Before you leave 'em all far behind

'Cause it's the new Mother Nature takin' over
It's the new splendid lady come to call
It's the new Mother Nature takin' o…

Another Way to Die - Jack White / Alicia Keyes

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Un bon croquis

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Un bon croquis vaut mieux
qu'un long discours

They cut us down like grass
for daring to disobey


And to be honest,
Moving against them was a mistake
We could have cared less about slaves

We just wanted
White fields of cotton
and Gold and Barley
The winter rye
The summer corn
And our women

Southern Women
In soft and white lace
lightly coated with talcum
like teacakes

And Lemonade
Ok, Maybe with some Tea mixed in

But they were angry at us
for building factories
in Atlanta
Powered by water
and Machines
and water wheels
and steam

It was 1861
we were rooked
by a small invasion and then
the fine people of Charleston
into fighting
their war machine


We were half their men
And we made twice their kills
We shot so many
We ran out of ammunition

In the second year
Lincoln changed things
It is far better
a man dies for freedom
than some some colored ribbon

We were pretty sure
He had read Napoleon

They Won

The rest is history
A set of lies agreed upon

But

There is a secret image
In an ab…

Boom - P.O.D

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Deviant Art

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Telephone - Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta/Beyoncé Giselle Carter

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Divorce

I am the child of a broken family. Not so , in terms of love or care - but simply, that when I was five, my parents divorced.

They were young. He later remarried a beautiful and very kind nurse, and they are happily married. She remarried and divorced. Three or four times. I stopped counting after the second one. It is a difficult thing to do, for a 12 year old to do, to tell his mother that he will not live with her. But it's a decision, like others, that I have made carefully. Ultimately it wasn't a bad one.

Some of this is going to be easy. Some, maybe not so easy. In fact, some of this is going to be a street fight. We make our own rules. But we're fair.

So. My father and mother were the first divorce I was introduced to. My first impression, as a five year old, was that divorce is just two grown up people, making a a mistake.


Have you ever heard anyone talk about their divorce? They never say how they were a complete idiot. They just talk about how much of an …

Glory Box - Portishead

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A History of Economies

The history of economies of Wstern nations has, since the early nineteenth century, been one of repeated cycles of growth and recession. Typically, four or five years of expansion have been followed by onr or two of retraction , with occasionall massive retrenchments lasting five or six years. Graphs of national wealth often resembe the profiles of angular mountain ranges, in whose every valley lie the bankruptcies of long-established firms, the layoffs of workforces, the closings of factories, the destruction of stock. We may seek to attribute those events to unnatural dimensions of economic life, and we may hope that one day we will learn to avert them, but for the time being, the best efforts of governments and central banks have demonstrated that there is little to be done about such turbulence.

Every cycle follows a similar pattern. It begins when growth picks up and companies invest in new capacity to meet perceived future needs. Production costs tend to escalate at this stage, …

I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones

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Black, White and Red

It was mostly by accident we met
Cruelty and I
merciless punishment meted against
compulsions I deny

red and black
a black rank
of lambs led to the slaughter
on the tangled bank



At first, I wasn't sure we could be friends
I was seeing truth at the time
not the younger one,
but her sister

I am not polyamorous
which means
Every time I am faced with another love
I am torn apart
until I can find the white queen
and ask her again
why she is running

The sound of her voice
helps me decide
It is so sweet
from the latin Persuade

Latin persuadēre, from per- thoroughly + suadēre to advise, urge
to sweeten
saccharine, cloying

I will say
before I leave
The meeting with the queen
never goes well
It always leaves
me waking up in the middle of the night

because she whispers to me
the origin of words
their real meaning
are an ocean
unknowable

except at the shore
And reminds me
of the time
I stood upon that shore
and left my brother

But the meeting is done
The white lady came
and I chose fr…

Life in the Year 2000

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Brought to you in Technicolor(tm) by turnerBroadcasting

Californication - RHCP

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Politics and Independence

I lay claim to being a political independent. Last night, I watched "Atlas Shrugged" . I think I learned something about vulnerability and lost love.

Let's start with where I began. I was and am a Libertarian. I openly worked for and supported the Libertarian party . This was when the libertarian party wasn't just a beard you wear to cover Republican leanings; the focus of the party was to create an environment in which our country could grow - a high stakes gamble against institutionalized bureaucracy that would have resulted in the creation of a regulatory atmosphere not unlike the environment our founding fathers enjoyed. If you don't believe it, go to Williamsburg sometime and listen to the courthouse lecture sine qua non.

How did I come to be allied with Democrats? Because I traded stock for a few months while I melted down a Golden Parachute. For a person trained to read graphs - it will not take you long to realize where and how the trades are going dow…

One Thing - Finger Eleven

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Not So Dark After All.

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Once I got a FedEx at my office. She screamed at me for hours, and claimed that I was getting a book from a writer, who was supposedly in love with me by sending me free copies of her book. I picked it up and brought it home. It was a mail order catalog. She yelled at my mother over an argument because she wanted to send my 12 year old daughter to eastern europe alone. My mother yelled back. It went on for almost a year. She kicked the windshield out of my car with her heel because I gave someone a gummi bear.

5/16/12 1:47 : The house is quiet. Everything is peaceful and not so dark after all.



Just an observation..

Not many people realize this, but Penguins are vicious meat eaters.




"All of This Was True, More or Less.."

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Ice

I am dead

It happened like this:
I realized who I really was
and then
I made sure they killed me
they didn't notice
I had used them
as a tool

And yet
Misery
persists

That's what we really learned
Isaac's father was really
killing God


This isn't about
telling you how things are

After all you can see for yourself
and you like the Ramones

Personally, I think you're going to be okay
I'm simply beginning my story
as close to the truth as I can

It's about stupid zombies
and last suppers
and the fuckability of man


Are you doing anything tonight?
I thought maybe we could go see "The Big Chill"
you could tie me up
and beat me

Like a dead horse

But you had plans
for both of us
that involve
a trip out of town

to a place I'd seen in a magazine
that you'd left lying around

I don't have you with me
but I keep
a good attitude

Lifted
from Elliott Smith
This too:

next door TV's flashing blue
frames on the wall
it's a comedy
of errors yo…

The Count

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Politics in Space - Kate Miller Heidke

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I'm not gonna state my case anymore
'Cause I haven't got a leg to stand on
I'm not gonna take the leap anymore
'Cause I got no mat to land on

I'm not gonna smoke that sh*t anymore
It'll only get me thinking
And I better not paddle upstream anymore
'Cause this canoe is sinking



No no no no no no
No no no no no no

Are you alright? (Pretty much)
Are you okay? (Pretty much)
You got your health? (Pretty much)
You know the way? (Pretty much)
You know your limit? (Pretty much)
You understand? (Pretty much)
Are you the man? (Pretty much, pretty much, pretty much)

Citizens don't stand up anymore
There's no point losing face
Sound off! 1 2 3 4
Politics in space




I'm not gonna be polite anymore
'Cause everybody's got bad manners
I'm not gonna make any plans anymore
'Cause the works are full of spanners
I'm not gonna meditate anymore
The revolution is off the agenda
I'm a baby boomer's daughter
And I'm never gonna reach n…

One Thing - Finger Eleven

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Restless tonight
Cause I wasted the light
Between both these times
I drew a really thin line
It's nothing I planned
And not that I can
But you should be mine
Across that line



If I traded it all
If I gave it all away for one thing
Just for one thing
If I sorted it out
If I knew all about this one thing
Wouldn't that be something?



I promise I might
Not walk on by
Maybe next time
But not this time

Even though I know
I don't want to know
Yeah I guess I know
I just hate how it sounds

If I traded it all
If I gave it all away for one thing
Just for one thing
If I sorted it out
If I knew all about this one thing
Wouldn't that be something?



The White Lady Loves You More

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The Earth Is Not A Cold Dead Place

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I read in the newspaper today that we've destroyed 30% of the biodiversity of our planet in the past 40 years, and that our energy consumption rate now exceeds the total capacity of the planet by .5 earths.

As Rain

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You are the being
that is closest to origin

That is your gift

Was it is your instinct?

To lower your defenses

And so it goes..



Life will end

Thrown

into a Cloud

that circles us

and comes down

on another Earth

As rain

American Beauty

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Marietta, Ga.

Bring Me to Life - Evanescence/Firefly[AMV]

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What is Different Now

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I am still the same. My life is still the same. But I have a vivid image of where I am and where I am going and I am less afraid of death. Life is a form of miracle. And it is for the living, no matter how much pain or anxiety it brings.

Love transcends time and space. Sort of like faith. Which is why the Bishop of London was so pure, in his speech to William and Kate. Set the world on fire, but not the fire that burns and destroys. Maybe. St. Elmo's Fire...


I have made mistakes in life, love - and very rarely - on the golf course. I am someone who is willing to invest in something that might not pay off. I know what you're thinking. "Of course. You play Golf. You're perfectly willing to waste your time hitting a little white ball all over the place and not getting anything for it. Thank you, Captain Obvious".

To which I will reply. No. I have been undergoing sort of a radical change these past two weeks. A serious change. Naturally a woman is behind it all. …

See How We Are - X

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For Rover, With Torn Edges and Drool

You always loved everything to be defined. So. Here with torn edges, and perhaps a little drool. That I am sure you can - with a little love of life, ignore. Let me put this in your hand with my paws pressed against your chest.

1. Status - one's position in society; the word derived from the latin statum or standing (past participle of the verb stare, to stand)


2. Status Anxiety - A worry, so pernicious as to be capable of ruining extended stretches of our lives, that we are in danger of failing to conform to the ideals of success laid down by our society and that we may as a result be stripped of our dignity and respect; a worry that we are currently occupying too modest a run or are about to fall to a lower one.


3. Hunger for status, like all appetites, can have its uses: spurring us to do justic to our talents, encouraging excellence, restraining us from harmful eccentricities and cementing members of a society around a common value system. But, like all appetites, its excess…

Island - Heather Nova

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Cape Code K'wassaa K'wassaa - Vampire Weekend

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My List for This Week

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1. Try to save my own soul. This is slowly beginning to dawn on me, as a bigger job than I thought. The human capacity to be able to lie to oneself really should never be underestimated. The path to becoming better is to make sure to prioritize.. getting better. Thank you, Captain Obvious.



2. Take care of those I love. Make safer places, fix things that are broken. And most important of all be willing to invest in relationships. I take responsibility for some of the emotional carelessness and it doesn't feel good. But it can be fixed. I have to take care of the woman I love. And my wife, too.


3. Make more money. It's clear things are turning around - I'm not going to get 'bankruptcy' pricing on some things. So, my margin is less, I have
to work more to make up for it in sales and production. And for the money I make, I need to be able to spend wisely. Not buying stupid things I don't need.



5. Give everyone a reason to smile. Everyone. This includes…

Paper Cup (Love, Actually) - Heather Nova

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Viðrar vel til Loftárása - Sigur Ros

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Driveway Song of Solomon

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It's important to be open to yourself about moments in life. It's kind of a bit like health. It's a good idea to just sit down with a pencil or a pen, and write everything that you feel is uniquely going on with you healthwise, then come up with a plan that is really unique to you. Like false religion , spectrum multivitamins and one size fits all approaches don't really work.

Moments in your life can be moments you can feel. They are the expression of an infinite soul. Even if you will never change the world, you are still unique and wonderful and those moments are part of a beautiful journey that can be both intensely painful and a harbinger of joy.

If you numb yourself to feeling one thing, no matter what it is - it will only numb you to feel something else. That is a serious danger. Don't let it happen. Even if it hurts. It's better to feel pain than it is to pretend it doesn't exist. This is a path to pleasure. You will quickly find that most of the…

Tom's Diner - Suzanne Vega

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Don'tcha - P.C.D. / Busta Rhymes

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Politics in Space - Kate Miller Heidke

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Driveway Moment

I sat in my car today, with the rain softly falling. And for no reason, I started talking to you. As if you were there. At first, it honestly kind of hurt. A part of me knew that you weren't there, and at the same time - I wanted you to be with me so badly I didn't care. So I kept talking.

I talked about basically two things. First, what exactly is my plan? Second. Why am I not with you. The rain began to fall, bit by bit. I felt so strange, so completely depressed. But , for some reason - I also felt -for a moment -that I could feel again. I felt everything. I felt the sadness began to grow, and wash over me like a wave at the beach. And the next words that I said, alone - began to carry a sort of invisible weight. I talked about problems that I could not solve. About things that I need to do. About life.

You mean everything to me. You are so much a part of me. A part of me wanted to simply pretend that you didn't exist and then the other part idealized you beyond a…

Moments of Pleasure - Kate Bush

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Teresa

I would like to share part of my life

My friend and I
are in his garage
making things that explode
and fixing things broken

It was then
Some warm feeling made me promise him
when Mother Teresa became a saint
that I would become catholic

I was really thinking about my girlfriend
but I promised just the same


He told me in confidence
and here you can't read his name
the girl he first kissed
joined a convent

I think if you stop frame
you can see the moment
his heart was broken


I did everything a best friend could do
to help him understand
when a woman loves a man
Even God
No force on earth can stop it
and that someone else will come along

I drew on a memory of when I was young
and love was bright
and I remembered her name
like a song

Someone else came along
and even though his mom
put up a fight
I was on his side

Dear Reader
She is beautiful
they have two children
Of which as I write
one has been born
and the other is a spark
in their eyes

And his workshop is quiet
our work is done

Tarp Surf - Burn 2011

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Interchangeable, Like Batteries.

Someone once described ministers as "Interchangeable, Like Batteries." They say the same things, do the same things and one could be substituted for another.

This is largely true. But for reasons you may not suspect.

It was not always this way. During the time of St. Augustine there were precious few who would lay claim to being able to work in theology. Religion , like human interaction, story telling and non synthetic social networking - found its way to the center of everyone's life. And people were curious. During his time, if you wanted to study theology - you first had to study and master chemistry, physics, mathematics and biology. At least, that is how St. Augustine wrote about it - in his book "City of God". In those days, any signal from God could likely have been heard loud and clear. And likely rare. When a young child was born to a village, who for example, may have photographic memory or some form of extraordinary ability - it was considered a …