Punching a Theocon

I can't hear you
over the sound
of how awesome I am

When I walk into the room
the lamestream media doesn't care
but I am the hero you dreamed of

As I walked to the podium
I planned to give a speech
where I would tell everyone
that conservatism is christian
and christianity is conservative
but just then
someone walked straight up to me

and punched me in the nose
and my blood flowed
red

When I awoke
I found myself
with a 50,000.00 hospital bill
from six teams of specialists
that had all run tests
telling me
everything
is ok