My Last Game of Spider Solitaire

I hate spider solitaire. I hate it. Its a pointless, meaningless game. The only way to win, is not to play. And I have now, officially won.

With a score of 1168, I have just now officially dealt the last game of spider solitaire that I will ever play on this workstation. I am going to tear this workstation apart today and rebuild it, remove the hard disk, back up the mail, store away all the documents and work + blitz the drive. Then I am going to salvage a few key components + build another workstation.

And on this new workstation I will install at least one game, that is worth playing. Solitaire is a worthless, mind-numbing waste of time. It is a plague upon the games up of the world - like its namesake, spinning a web of wasted time and fang perfectly peaceful moments with its venomously random card-shuffling action. I will no longer be held captive in a tangled web, moving my arm over the cards like some dime store gypsy, looking to flop a five of spades, or the six of diamonds, or any other card from any other suite for that matter. I am not designed to sort and shuffle cards into ascending stacks of Ace through King in a suite. I don't care if the suites symbolize the four seasons, diamonds, hearts, spades and clubs to symbolize summer, spring, winter and fall. And don't even ask me which one is which because I don't care.

Sure, ok, ok, there's that cool animation that plays after you win - it looks kind of like fireworks - if fireworks were made out of cyan and magenta colored ping pong balls. Well so what. It's just not enough. I am free of you, Solitaire. You can stack your alluring deck of cards with their changeable backs and send your siren song of spiderness to someone else. This is not the last straw, its the last hand. I knew it as I was playing it. Each card that fell, just now, I truly savored as my very last.

Crayon physics here i come.