Confession: I need you to understand something


I need you to understand something.
I need you to understand faith.

My faith is my faith in you.
My love is my love for you.

My life is my life lived for you.
My heart. Is your heart.

This is an eternal golden braid.
A skein woven of space and time and light and spirit.
Shimmering in the dark.

It is a mystery.
It is hope.
It is despair.
It is darkness.

The kind you think is not a part of your life.
The kind you feel at night, in the quiet.
The kind that whispers of the immortal now.
The everpresent then.
The past that never left you.
The future receding to the horizon.

This is a confession of hatred.
A confession of love.

The hurt in my heart that I wanted to drive away.
The drive itself, long, boring, uneventful.
The point at which you throw yourself awake.

The strange reasons for why you live.
Thankful that you did.

This is a confession of faith.
That all life is sacred.

That your heart . Touched my heart.
That my life. Touched your life.

This is creepy action at a distance.
This is love.

This is the sense that no matter what happens.
No matter what we say. Or do.

That somehow. We will become better people.
And we will do what we need to do.

Both you. And I .
And this is a confession.
That I know it will hurt.

And that I know that I hurt you.
And I am sorry.

This is a confession.
I need you to understand something.

I need you to understand it's ok to listen.
And I need you to understand it's ok to wait.
I need you to know. I am coming for you.

And one day.
I will be there.

One day when you least expect it.
And we will be able to at last, relax. And enjoy that moment.

And this is a confession.
I need you to understand something.

That every moment we live, every love we share -
our faith
even playful as it is

Leads us to become

And from our work, undying, the promise of page
the dark electron
and wrinkled line

Comes age.

We were together when we were young.
We will be together when we die.

I was afraid. Of death. I saw it in your eyes.

But I am not afraid any longer.

Because I learned, slowly - shedding layer upon layer
and of course, a hell of a lot of really good drugs

I learned that I love you in all your forms.
Ad majorem dei gloriam
Opus Dei

My prayers fold
about you,
your child, your love,
your circle

They are a blind hope
A submission

The prayer that we will feel today,
now. The wonder of life

Power exchange.

Wonder twin powers activate.

Show me your father's grave.
I will pick up a handful of earth.

And lay it where he rests.
A good man.
He knew your name.

Together. We will feel the air.
See the stone. Touch its surface.

Your name will echo throughout time.
My bloody valentine.