A. D.

A. Dream.

I was on the shore, you and your new husband and child were there. A therapist dressed up as a big bunny rabbit to be the "kid". They wanted to know if you could accept your kid. You seemed to be unable to accept your own child.

I was there. I saw the bunny and chased after it. And played with it. The bunny rabbit had razor stubble.

This was the first dream I have ever had of you. You were polite, we met as friends. The little one was running around. You were slightly indifferent to the child. The child saw me and liked me. But at first , was skeptical.

I remember thinking in the dream, that I have never seen you here before. I woke up just wanting to tell you that you seemed to still be the same person, and that for some reason, I am friendly to you. And that we meet, in honor.

I guess its up to you. You can forget about me. Your husband seemed... whats the word.. kind of distant and soft. And slightly uninteresting, but not so much so that you wouldn't want to say hi. Both you and he stood together and yet apart.

And I stood alone. Oh. And I chased after that bunny rabbit. The therapist was please with me.

I think I got something for it but not sure what it was.


Perhaps I did not see you.
Perhaps I did not hear you.
Perhaps I did not sense you.

You who promised me so much,
You who gave so much joy.
You who were so funny & hopeful.

Where is the fun now?
Where is the joy now?
Where are you now?

Is this a new collar?
Is it really mine again?
Is it pretty?

I am glad you are there
I am glad you care
I am sad not to encourage you

What is it Scarlett said?

Yet many will find this & be angry
One will find this & shout at me
for even whispering...

if you want to kiss the sky
better learn how to kneel

on your knees, boy