Getting My Butt Kicked in Scrabble (Edited)

I have a friend who claims to be a kink author, but I'm not really sure if this is the case. Certainly she's bright. And she knows her way around the scrabble board. But I have never had the chance to read anything other than the scrabble board - mostly with my face pressed into it by the back of her elbow against my head. Ok, just kidding. We play online. At this point, thanks to her win last night - has the score between us is 'tied'. Double entendre, anyone?

Last night I was defeated (civil word for it) 234 to 330. This is largely due to a vocabulary that is nothing short of amazing. Also, more than likely due to the fact that she's autistic in some way, probably some suppressed form of Asperger's syndrome. Give her one wildcard and she can almost always score a 35 point bingo bonus. She supposedly scored a 447 in a single game. 119 on a single word alone. And yes, I can beat her. Damnit. And I will.

She claims she plays the board, and not the player. My error on the board was to let slip that I was drawing all consonant tiles (I drew seven sets in a row). Magically, I found the triple word and double word scoring tiles somehow all land on consonant intersecting lines of play. She started watching a movie during our game .. "The Hangover".

Now, to be fair, I was able to battle my way back a bit in the midgame enough for her to actually pause the film. But I would guess its likely that she just had something better to do - and paused simply because she had to leave the board. We would all like to believe our best effort is something that can't simply be ignored by another. But its not.

Being beaten in scrabble isn't as bad as being beaten in chess. Somehow, your mind drifts and you start playing games with the words on the board. Dyadic. Fidge. Leucine. Regional. Ex.

Being beaten in chess, forces you to think of such thoughts as. "He's going to kill my knight". Or.. "My pawn is going to get its throat cut". "I'm trapped with nowhere to escape" ... "That bishop looks like he's carrying a knife".. "If I do that, those two pawns will double up on me and they will be so into each other they'll just sit in a hotel room and read Herman Hesse and screw ".

She's good. I think everyone should have someone who can beat your ass in scrabble up down and sideways. Even if they are , after all, really only secret members of the FBI witness protection program.

Comments

Anonymous said…
you probably deserved it.
LOL . Yeah she's pretty good. We are actually both tied at this point.

I'm gonna edit out the FWB part because we're not having sex, she's just screwing me over the scrabble board occasionally.
Anonymous said…
Wow. An Information-Super-Highway guy, like yourself, failed at something? Also, why question her career when being nothing more than Scrabble-partners? Such exposure might come hand-in-hand if you're married, but when cybering, nothing should be expected or requested. Better yet, maybe you've done something to slight her in the past. Women are crazy, you know? Especially the smart ones.

Love your Blog, but I like it best when it's personal. The Soapbox Rants can be exhausting. Then again, are you really all that concerned about pleasing anyone?
Anonymous said…
Wow. An Information-Super-Highway guy, like yourself, failed at something? Also, why question her career when being nothing more than Scrabble-partners? Such exposure might come hand-in-hand if you're married, but when cybering, nothing should be expected or requested. Better yet, maybe you've done something to slight her in the past. Women are crazy, you know? Especially the smart ones.

Love your Blog, but I like it best when it's personal. The Soapbox Rants can be exhausting. Then again, are you really all that concerned about pleasing anyone?
Anonymous said…
Wow. An Information-Super-Highway guy, like yourself, failed at something? Also, why question her career when being nothing more than Scrabble-partners? Such exposure might come hand-in-hand if you're married, but when cybering, nothing should be expected or requested. Better yet, maybe you've done something to slight her in the past. Women are crazy, you know? Especially the smart ones.

Love your Blog, but I like it best when it's personal. The Soapbox Rants can be exhausting. Then again, are you really all that concerned about pleasing anyone?
Anonymous said…
Wow. An Information-Super-Highway guy, like yourself, failed at something? Also, why question her career when being nothing more than Scrabble-partners? Such exposure might come hand-in-hand if you're married, but when cybering, nothing should be expected or requested. Better yet, maybe you've done something to slight her in the past. Women are crazy, you know? Especially the smart ones.

Love your Blog, but I like it best when it's personal. The Soapbox Rants can be exhausting. Then again, are you really all that concerned about pleasing anyone?
Jill said…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tQ5r1LfKnY
Ok, to set the record straight.

1. I did get my butt kicked in scrabble.

2. Smart women are crazy like a fox.

3. Soapboxes make you feel tall.

:)
Anonymous said…
Hey, whatever you say.

Do you prefer your women crazy and smart, or comfy and ignorant?

Soapboxes are overrated - you're tall enough.

Will you put yourself in a position of possible ass-kicking again?