Prosody / Personality and GPS

I wonder sometimes what it would be like to have an ideal GPS unit in my car. With a perfect accent, and identity. 

So lets talk about personality. Mr T. would be slightly abrasive. Mr. T's accent would be , like "Ah pity the fool that don't turn right, right here." .. but in British accent it would be "Ah. Mrs. Peale. Please be so kind as to turn right".  So I think I would go for british.

Second, it would have to have a nice name. Something frisky. Yet, serious and distinct enough so that in a noisy car I can still say it and it will understand what I am saying. Distinct. Frisky. Hmm.... lets say... Adrienne.  Thats perfect. :)  Never mind the reference to "Little Nicky".

Ok, here's the good version. " Ms. Peale, please turn right "  "Ok, Adrienne".  (astronomy domine humming along..) (ping!) you have arrived. (thank you!)

Now here's the bad version.  "I PITY THE FOOL THAT DON'T TURN RIGHT AT THE NEXT INTERSECTION"... (big lound sound as you miss the turn! diddly da da dum) then as you drive along..  ( thump thump ka-thump)( arggg!) - you arrive, and it ends the trip by playing "milkshake" by celis. she is a big science fiction fan, by the way.

Lets do a list, since lists are alot of fun.And also I am on a wireless connection and I have nothing better to do than type out a list while I see if the thing is going to crash (plagued by a random power problem that takes 10 minutes to happen. this thing took me hours to fix. I think it is done though.)

  1. British accent, probably slightly Australian (coastal dialect) . Female.  Tight, simple prosody.
  2. Southern accent, again female. Atlanta accent. Soft, slow and clear. Beautiful high laughter.  Dialect includes the occasional good natured barb.
  3. American accent, male. Southwest Dialect.  To the point. Soprano.
  4. German accent. male.   Lexical disambiguation. Curt answers. 

And the worst:

  1. Mr. T, Angry. Growling voice. (best of the worst, it could actually be fun) 
  2. Scottish/ British Accent with high prosody - cf. Graham Cleese
  3. Cambodian Accent - part French, Part Asian. Will tie you in knots. Prepare top be lost
  4. And the worst of the worst? How about an alternately Male/ Female voice pair that argues about the directions.. "Turn here.." and then she says "Don't listen to him, he doesn't know what he is doing" . Make sure your insurance is current if you have this one. Two people bickering in the car. Never.